If you’re feeling overwhelmed by what’s happening right now, I don’t believe there’s a more important time than now to take a step back from the noise and chaos of the external world. To turn off the news, to avoid getting caught up in the rising storm of hate and violence around you and to instead try to build a more solid foundation for yourself to stand on. As smaller pieces in the collective puzzle, the picture is way too big, and is going to play out however it needs to regardless, so it’s okay to stop and take a deep breath. Set down the weight of responsibility for the world for a while, because it isn’t only yours to carry.
I know the future feels unstable, chaotic, and unsettled, but if we keep feeding into that energy, that will only breed more of the same. So I believe right now, it’s incredibly important to take this time to become more rooted in your Self. To become quiet so that you can hear your own internal voice more clearly to find out who you really are. To tap into your own intuition, your own bodily sensations and emotions, and to unravel your own story, by gently asking the (uncomfortable) questions of why you are the way you are, and where what you’re feeling could be coming from in order to release them. To maybe find out where you actually fit into what’s going on, what your strengths and values are and what kind of presence you want to offer the world. Personally, I feel better spreading words of love, kindness, compassion and personal healing, rather than those of hate, anger, fear and judgment, because I believe it’s the lack of Love that has got us into this mess in the first place.
Though we are always tied to the external story going on around us, I believe their roots are always at the centre of our own personal story, not others. Our own experiences, upbringings and generational traumas are what made us who WE are, which also need to be given the attention they deserve, because that is then what we’ll bring in to the world. We need to give our Self space for healing, that is apart from others. To honour our own story, by crying out whatever it is we haven’t allowed ourselves to feel to release the energies that are feeding into this society. Though I don’t believe that gives us a free pass to take out our pain on others either, because we’re all responsible for our own reactions.
I think when we get too caught up in the healing of others, we can forget that we are also in pain and that we need just as much care and attention. Our own story matters too, the one lived by all of our past selves that got us to this point. This isn’t to say that we shouldn’t speak up or help wherever we can, but I do believe we need to be careful not to lose our Self in the process. Martyrdom is not a sustainable way to live if we aren’t properly rooted first. And if we’re solely focusing on the healing of others, while neglecting our own personal pain, it will only lead to burnout and the burying further of our own trauma that also needs to be healed. Sometimes when our energy is limited, we need to make the decision to keep it for ourselves. I don’t believe this is selfish, but necessary so that we can then regain our strength in order to become more effective at helping later. You can’t pour from an empty cup.
Personally, as someone who usually puts others before myself, worrying about taking care of their needs while neglecting my own, this has been a big shift. Losing myself in other peoples lives, has only caused more suffering. But when I’m able to see myself THROUGH someone else, by looking at what’s being reflected back at me through the lens of MY story, that has led to the biggest releases of my own pain. Often we learn the most about ourselves through the experiences of other people, but to do that we first have to accept the task of figuring out what that person is actually reflecting back at us. To take Self-responsibility for our actions and feelings. This doesn’t mean it is you OR them, it’s you AND them. Help others, while simultaneously helping yourself by making sure your own needs are being met in the process. It’s a fine balance, but right now, we need as many people as possible to get themselves as grounded and centred as they can. The more calm you can get your inner world now, the less affected you’ll be by the external storms, which is what we’ll be needing from more people going forward. Find your own eye within the storm, and then do what you can to share that space with others.